Setting: The farmer’s market.
Lance: *in Altean* Is that guy seriously trying to pick up girls with vegetable puns?
Pidge: *in Altean* Yup. Not sure how he manages to come up with new ones every month.
Lance: *in Altean* Mad props to him for his dedication, but vegetable puns? Really??
Shiro: Guys, no gossiping in alien languages.
Lance:
Pidge:
Lance: *in Spanish* Vegetable puns…
Just once, I want the hero to go “your wife/sister/mother/whatever would not have wanted this!”, and the villain to go, “actually, we talked about this a lot. She was really into vigilante justice and eye for an eye stuff. She always said, if something like this happens, avenge me.”
“Your mother never would have wanted this!”
“Wow you clearly never met my mother.”
“Okay so I was going to say your sister wouldn’t want this, but then – “
“ – you realized that was the stupidest fucking thing that’s ever tried to come out of your mouth? and wow is that a high bar -”
“Right, but here’s the thing: okay, so your sister would totally have wanted to do this, but let’s both be honest here, we both loved her, but your sister had some serious temper and impulse control problems. And she wouldn’t’ve wanted you to do this. She would have wanted to come back from the dead and do it herself. So I feel like right now, you should take a step back, and let her work towards her goal if she’s still out there to have it.”
One of the reasons my psych has stayed my psych is that she understands that I am not in fact going to kill myself, but goddamn do I need a space to TALK ABOUT THE SUICIDALITY without having to carry other people’s shit.
That her primary population of care is people like combat veterans with severe PTSD is not, frankly, unrelated to this.
theclumsiestninja 