crotah:

some things people should consider incorporating into mchanzo fic, from someone who grew up in a family where japanese & american culture often clashed:

•hanzo going over to mccree’s place, maybe to meet his family or something. everyone is wearing their shoes inside the house. why the fuck is everyone wearing their shoes inside the house? disgusting

•hanzo going to america and wanting to eat as MUCH steak as possible whenever possible. mccree suggests getting some sushi but hanzo vetoes the idea. he orders steak no matter where he goes, even for breakfast. (beef is super cheap in america compared to japan because we have such a large supply of it here. when my dad’s old buddies from japan visit, they literally always request steak, without exception)

•Americans talk waaay too loudly for hanzo and socializing for long periods of time gives him a headache. they’re mostly friendly, just really loud. and way too touchy-feely. like no, hugging is not an acceptable form of greeting.

•green tea packets are everywhere–hanzo drinks green tea all the time. when he travels places overnight, he takes his tea brewing equipment with him, even to hotels. he refuses to purchase bottled tea; he has to make it himself, or he doesn’t trust it.

•idk if this is true across the board, but the japanese side of my family always refuses to kill household pests. they always catch & release things instead of killing them: spiders, moths, bees, even ants. hanzo is the same way. he gets super angry when mccree squishes an ant, and at first he thinks he’s joking, but he is dead fucking pissed that mccree killed that ant

•natto spread over toast for breakfast. hanzo thinks this is a normal staple meal for people across the globe until he makes it for mccree, who pretends to like it but is actually repulsed. (natto is made of fermented soybeans, smells terrible, but tastes pretty okay if you grow up eating it. it’s definitely an acquired taste)

•a lot of japanese candies have wrappers made of rice paper, so they’re edible. mccree is astonished when hanzo eats a butterscotch candy, plastic wrapping and all, and starts to choke. also, fish flavored candy is pretty common there, much to mccree’s horror. and don’t even get him started on the jumbo 12-inch shrimp flavored crackers hanzo likes so much

•japanese portion sizes are really small compared to american ones. my obasan used to scold me because I would always have 3 or 4 helpings of the food she cooked. hanzo probably scolds mccree too, and has to start cooking more food on the regular because his bf eats so damn much.

•soooo many japanese superstitions. mccree sticks his chopsticks vertically into his rice, only to be lectured by hanzo for inviting the gods of death into his house. hanzo gets shat on by a bird and is surprisingly chill about it because, hey, it’s good luck. another time, hanzo insists mccree shifts his bed around so his head isn’t facing north, just to be safe.

•hanzo always drinks hot water instead of cold water, probably to simulate the experience of drinking green tea when he has no green tea to drink

•hanzo has pictures/statues of buddha all over the place, despite having grown up practicing shinto (this is something my dad does, the only explanation I can think of is that it’s like the japanese version of elf on the shelf. buddha is always watching, so don’t misbehave. mccree catches on and always turns the buddha figures around before engaging in sexy times w/ his bf)

•shamisen music is the only acceptable music. absolutely no country music is allowed

•hanzo is horrified to learn that mccree doesn’t even own a rice cooker. how does he not not own a rice cooker? what does he eat, does he just starve? he doesn’t even have the little frozen rice squares in his freezer. pathetic